I love Christmas. I love the decorations, the feeling, the desire to make someone else's holiday a happy one. I love decorating my home with things both familiar and new. I love holiday music, whether sacred or 'profane' (that would not include Grandma getting run over by a reindeer.)
And I love the comfort and joy that the greatest Gift of all brings to my life. But I'm not given to proselytizing - one tenet of my faith that I'm just not comfortable with.
Making some measure of peace with the fact that people who don't even believe in the core miracle of Christmas still co-opt the material aspects of the season is still a bit of challenge for me, though. They are welcome to what they take of it. It's just such a meager, hollow portion.
I can also understand why some folks hate this time of year. It can be a very sad and lonely time. So many memories bombarding us. But we do have choices: let the memories overwhelm and burden us, or not. I choose not.
I miss my sister so much...every single day...but never more than at Christmas. It was her birthday, but that's not what makes her loss so palpable at this time of year.
She was the easiest person in the world to gift. We couldn't have been more different, but I knew her likes, and she mine, like no other. It was never about lavishness...just finding that special something. Whatever it might turn out to be. We knew how to appreciate each other. I still find things for her, and I believe that she knows. But I still miss seeing what special 'find' she might have in store for me - always creative. Always fun.
I know, beyond any doubt, that continuing to celebrate the holidays, in full, is the best way to honor her memory. So I have, I do, and I always will.
6 comments:
It can be a very sad time of the year. Hogmanay can be a bit of a downer as you get older and fewer friends and family are still here to celebrate.
So sorry about your sister, I hope you still chat to her!
I loved seeing your decorations. Is that a huge elephant that I can see?
Thanks - I love decorating. Hate putting away after, but it's the price one pays.
And yes -- we always have an elephant in the room...so to speak. Lovingly referred to as a BUFE, it was a fairly common 'souvenir' purchase of the American soldier while in Vietnam. That's when my husband picked ours up.
I think that ours is kinda cute, but when I was in Vietnam a couple of years ago I saw them in particularly garish colors - finally understanding the acronym: Big Ugly F******g Elephant.
Merry Christmas, Carolyn!
I always think that the holidays are a time to remember your loved ones, I know its sad that they aren't there but Its better to embrace those memories, its definitley hard for me with my cousin cause xmas was the one time that we really got together and hung out and EXPECTED to see each other, sometimes I wouldnt go to a BBQ and sometimes him so its not weird at all family functions, but holidays it is.
p.s. I'm back to the blogosphere!
Pearl, I love your tree and decorations. Thanks for sharing the pictures. You and your sister are lovely. I know this time of year must be hard for you because of this loss, but I love that you celebrate Christmas and honor your sister by continuing the celebration of a holiday she and you both loved.
Hugsssssss!
Thanks, Bop. I still can't believe that this was the 5th Christmas without her. Still hurts like the first.
And nice to see you back again, MH! Congratulations on your graduation.
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